Words of Wisdom from TheCamel

If you have been to Thailand or India as a tourist, you may have seen one of those Snake shows. It's the show where you see a cobra become mesmerized by some young handler that moves around, taps the cobra on the head, and occasionally will kiss the snake. The snake will attempt to strike, but with speed, the handlers will quickly move away. Now some people say the handler is safe as the cobra has had its fangs removed, but I have seen a few videos on YouTube that show the handler missing the beat and the cobra taking the chance, and boom, fangs or no fangs, it looks like it hurts.

The bites would hurt, it could also kill you. There are worse snakes to be bitten by, the cobra is at number 3 on the hit list. Their venom is not the most potent among venomous snakes, but the amount of neurotoxin they can deliver in a single bite, up to two-tenths of a fluid ounce, is enough to kill 20 people, or even an elephant. That’s a teaspoon! The kiss of a cobra? Is quick and nasty, just like some google reviews, it’s full of venom!

Yes, folks the cobra only has one intention when they are lining you up for a vulnerable moment and strike those fangs and deliver that kiss. Its death and destruction, the person sitting back with the smartphone or laptop, is the same. Poised and ready to strike fear in your heart just like the kiss of the cobra, but with keystrokes and a bad google or social media review.

A cold meal, a lack of attention, and a moment where you let your service halo slip, boom, they will strike that keyboard with so much venom that it's guaranteed to suck the life out of your butcher, baker, candlestick-maker business.

There are no heads up and no chance of giving a reason, it’s a cobra kiss review first and accept explanation later. Wouldn't matter that you just lost a loved one or were going through personal trauma. You could have been hit by an earthquake or swallowed up by a tsunami, you have not treated them like the king or queen they consider themselves to be and you're going to pay. And usually, like the cobra stands up and puffs up before they strike? These cobra kisses will proudly proclaim, “I am going to post this on social media and ruin you and your business”. Wow, stand proud. Not!

In all honesty, why do people do that? I can understand the cobra, it needs to eat and protect itself so, of course, it uses its god-given destructive talent to make that happen. But why would another human being get the ultimate satisfaction in bringing down a business or another human being for a cappuccino with not enough sugar, or an Uber that took a wrong turn?

Now, King Cobras live in northern India, China, Thailand, Malaysia, Indonesia and the Philippines, so if you're reading this and living in one of those places, I suggest you watch your step when walking through long grass. But if you’re like the majority who live in suburbia or another country? You're safe, but if you do get bitten? As long as you can get to a hospital, there is an anti-venom, and if you get that on time you will survive. So there is good news and bad news.

Kiss of the cobra review? Well, that also has good and bad news. The bad news? If you get a venom infused comment from a Harry or Harriet consumer or customer, and you don't check it on time, potentially there will be no anti-venom for your business and it could suffer, or worse it could have permanent damage. The good news? If you catch the review on time, there is an anti-venom of steps in place to help you fight another day.

First let me say this, the cobra? In actual fact, they don't want to bite you, they would prefer to run away and eat a rat or something. But if you tap them on the head and grab them by the tail, they might sink those fangs in and deliver that fatal teaspoon. It's a defense mechanism or a way to get lunch. Harry or Harriet? They do it for spite or a moment of glory, so if you're one of those types, a kiss of the cobra reviewer, I will request nicely you go and eat a rat and leave the poor innocent alone or you go down the anti-venom method.

If you have a true complaint, a valid reason to get upset, or are not happy with a product or service, do what people used to do before the “like” button was invented, contact the company or business and see if you can sort things out.

I, personally, had a situation the other day, a restaurant we go to a lot, always super happy, but this one day the food was the worst we ever had. Now instead of raising it up and being ready to sink my fangs in via social media, I gave them the benefit of the doubt that something might be wrong. I messaged them instead of giving them a bad review. They were so happy! The reason behind the bad food day was solid and understandable, they offered a solution, and we both went on to live a long and healthy life. They also thank me for not making it public.

What if I did sink in the fangs? What if I did leave the kiss of the cobra? What if you have had that happen to you? What can you do? What tourniquet can be used to stop the venom from getting to your business’ vital organs?

Don't panic, relax, and go to work. First up, make sure you reply immediately to the cobra kiss. Nothing worse than silence and Google will help you more if you have tried to do something. Next, contact the client if you can, stay calm, and hear them out. It may have been your fault, one of your staff may have had a bad hair day and let you down. Who knows, but let them say their piece, try and solve the situation, and politely ask them to delete the review.

What if none of that works? Make sure you fix any issues, be nice, and get as many positive reviews as you can so potential customers see more good than bad.

The best advice? Stay out of the long grass and don't annoy the cobra. Keep your service great, monitor your products’ and people's performance, and never tap the cobra on the head or give anybody the chance to have a reason or an opportunity to give you a kiss of the cobra review.

Hugs to all.